"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered." (1 Peter 3:7, ESV)
This passage was pointed out to me just recently. What does it mean to live with your wife in an understanding way? (Granted, I'm not married but I think many of the same marital instructions apply to those of us in relationships)
I don't think it comes down to simply reading her face and seeing that she's not ok when she says "I'm fine." It's not as simple as that. We, as men, are charged with the responsibility of understanding our wives' needs. That means knowing what is causing her to stumble in her walk with Christ just as much as knowing what's troubling her emotionally. We have to be that deeply involved in their lives because it's our job to protect and guide them.
I like how the NASB translation states that your wife is your "fellow heir" in the grace of life. Peter clearly clarifies that just because men are created stronger (whether physically, emotionally, or otherwise), that does not make us superior in any way. We are equal heirs in the grace of life. I'm glad he included that so we can't get puffed up with pride or devalue the other sex.
I think the last part of this verse confused me the most, though. He says to do all this so that your prayers may not be hindered. Is he referring to all our prayers or what is he talking about? How are they even related? Well, the only thing I have to go on right now is the notes in my McArthur Study Bible which say that this was referring to a husband's prayers concerning the salvation and scanctification of his wife. I can only conclude that he was telling us that we need to keep our mindset in check and come to God with a heart full of love and understanding for our wife in order to pray for her without distractions or false-motives.
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